Tuesday, August 21, 2007

conversations at midnight

"Is it hot up here, or is it just me?'
"It's just you."
"Do you have an extra pillow? Mine's too hot."
"I know you have an extra pillow over there that you keep on reserve."
"Yeah, well, it's my extra one in case MY pillow gets hot or I need a bolster if my back hurts."
"Give me your pillow."
"Screw you, there's another one over by the computer desk."
*rustle rustle stomp flop sigh*
"This pillow sucks."
"It does not. Your pillow sucks. It's hard as a rock."
"Well, yours are all flat and cheap, it's like you seek out the flimsiest, cheapest pillows you can find."
"Fuck off, this here is a $60 pillow I'm using."
"Oh, is that the memory foam one? I haven't tried it."
*reaches over to touch pillow*
*slaps hand*
"Back it off! Mine!"


"Leo, move over."
"Hey, he's already on my side of the bed, leave him alone."
"He's too hot. I don't want your big hot furry cat on me."
"Heh. That's the same reason I don't want to cuddle with you."
"What are you saying?"
"Just that you're unnaturally hot, and kind of furry."
"I'm FURRY?"
"Well, sort of."

* bed starts shaking uncontrollably*

"I've got the giggles!"
"Jesus Christ, if you don't shut up, I will kill you."
*pokes my feet*
"Goddamnit, you know what! Great, now you made the cat leave!"
"I did not! Anyway, you can't prove it."
"See! You said I can't prove it! that's an admission of guilt!"
"I didn't do anything to your cat! (quietly) - not that you can prove anyway."
"You do know that I can kill you in your sleep, right?"

*another pause, then a ridiculous amount of laughing*

"What is so funny?"
"You realize that if we were to die tonight, and they looked at our computer, the last 2 searches I made were 'syphilis' and 'primordial dwarfism'"
"Uh - why?"
"I watched a movie about the Duke of Rochford, and his face fell off from tertiary syphilis"
"And I watched that show about the littlest people in the world."
"Ok, why are you laughing?"
"Because now I have the giggles!"
"You are a retard."

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