Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Where I talk about drugs

I went to the shrink yesterday. He put me on Zoloft and Klonopin. I have always been very against the use of antidepressants, but I really hit a wall last week. I felt like I was simply unable to function. One of the side effects of Zoloft is a loss of appetite, which is a bonus. I took my first dose and felt a little queasy for a few hours ( a common side effect) and have not wanted to eat. At all. It's 1pm, and I am not at all hungry. I know I need to eat something, and I will, but it's nice to not have the out of control bingeing going on. 

There's a lot more going on in my head, but I just can't articulate what I'm thinking and feeling. I have a different emotion every 10 seconds, and it gives one the feeling of being on a boat on choppy waters. I can't seem to get my sea legs. I'm much more easily irritated and sensitive these days. I'm pissy at a certain family member who has not picked up the phone to call me. I shouldn't be surprised, I shouldn't care this much or let it bother me, but it does. I have no armor up right now. I am just raw. I hope the meds kick in soon.

I watched 'The Number 23" last night. I liked it a lot. Very dark and weird, and I am shocked at myself for saying this, but Jim Carrey was one hot bitch in it. Yowza. Or maybe it was just the side effect of the klonopin. Hmmm.

1 comment:

weelittleme said...

I went back and read all about your awesome successes... Damn girl! You've made some great progress. I know it probably seems like that is all really far away and unimportant right now. But, doesn't matter you are still strong and awesome for doing all that swinging and some day, when you want them, those bells will be there waiting patiently for you. No rush.

Take care, mmkay. I'll be thinking bout you.